What’s Your Number?
I received this question today privately:
“Here’s a question for you. How many men and women have you slept with? I apologize if you find this offensive or inappropriate x”
First of all, why on Earth would you think you have to apologize for asking me that? Wouldn’t I be just a wee bit hypocritical if I was offended by that based on this site? You are sweet to pose the question that way none the less so thanks for your tact.
Now to answer your question… I have no clue. From the moment I moved to Los Angeles at the age of 19 from Utah… I divorced myself from the mentality that sex was only meant to be done in the ways that religious conservatives approved of.
And I was also raised without a father so I have no patriarch that shamed me into behaving like a good girl per his orders. (No offense meant to you fathers out there, but I have to say I know one too many women that are fucked up by daddy’s orders regarding sex. Great fathers in my opinion should encourage their daughters to figure out what is right for them personally rather than adhere to their own notion of morality.)
I did grow up around great men though. My uncles were, (and are,) very cool non mormon dudes that didn’t really try to force anything on me. There was no right or wrong taught to me by people I respected. Quite the opposite. I guess they figured I had a good head on my shoulders so I would figure it out. And so I did. I like to think my way worked for me. Might not be right for others.
I was sexually extremely adventurous off and on through out my adulthood starting at around 19… and now I’m done. Found the one I’m happy to finish my days with. Sort of a like a wild mustang out to pasture enjoying her older years with just one other horse having a grand ole time.
And when any man, including the man I’m now married to, has asked me in the past how many sexual partners I have had in my life, my answer has always been, “I didn’t know I was supposed to count. I was just doin’ what I do.” That kind of answer has always helped the right men for me find me. That’s the kind of answer that either causes one to run for the hills or jump up and down for joy that you found a woman who believes sexual choices should be made based on actual desire, not a need to make others approve.
I also always say here what I say everywhere, “I am neither ashamed nor proud of my past sexual choices… just stating facts.”
So that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. It’s what worked for me.
Thanks for the question!
Anyone else have anything to add about this kind of topic feel free. It does bring up some interesting debates no doubt about it.
***Adding this on for the person who just asked me privately after reading this…. to answer your question I’m pretty sure I fooled around with more women then men. It was the 90’s and Basic Instinct came out. I must have been hit on by dozens of women countless times… and I never said no. I dig chicks. But unfortunately I would get bored after a few minutes and sober up wondering if maybe I was only bisexual when drunk. Now in my wiser older years, I see that is a very accurate assessment.